No such thing as a bully

Bullies have been on my mind lately.  A few weeks ago we had the headline in the Guardian about a ‘bullying culture’ in universities.  I work in this sector, so the story was both interesting and familiar and prompted me to a direct marketing campaign – I can help employers with this kind of problem. Next I conducted a mediation where both parties were complaining about being bullied by the other.  This isn’t as unusual as it sounds.  My job (successful in this case) was to help each party hear [...]

Why’s that boy wearing my jacket?

I heard a programme on the Radio 4 recently about humiliation.  It told the story of a boy who grew up poor.  His mum had found a fabulous jacket in a jumble sale, which the boy adored.  All his friends wanted to know where he'd got it, so he'd made up a story about a rich uncle in the States.  Then one day, fetching a ball from neighbouring flats, a kid shouted out why's that boy wearing my jacket?  The kid's mother yelled back that she'd donated it to a [...]

2018-09-25T10:43:52+00:0025 September 2018|coaching, Ego, humiliation, mistake, misunderstanding|0 Comments

Talking too loudly on the bus

I am on a trip down the west coast of the US, taking in a few large cities and some smaller places.  It’s easy coming to the States, apart from the money.  Or not so much the money, but the tick I’ve developed whereby I can’t help comparing the notes to Monopoly.  It’s boring for anyone in the vicinity and I’m dealing with it.  The language is by and large the same; the culture is familiar from films and TV; America’s  political news was the world’s news even before Trump [...]

My Excellent Memory

I am proud of my excellent memory.  I know exactly what people said, what they wore, how the behaved, years back.  No one queries it, which is how I know I’m right. I am currently visiting the apartment in Aix en Provence that I first visited as a fifteen year old.  It’s not unusual to visit places you came to as a child, often you visit periodically over your life.  I guess it’s slightly less usual to have had a forty year gap. Several things have struck me.  First, I’d [...]

2018-08-21T19:50:49+00:0021 August 2018|coaching, memory, misunderstanding, Uncategorised|0 Comments